On Being Naked

Throwback Thursday

I have a journal that sits beside my bed of things that I’ve written over the years. It’s mostly just incomplete poems made up of random lines that I scribbled but never completed. As I was procrastinating doing homework tonight, I started flipping through it. This was in it, but without a date, so I’m not sure when I actually wrote it. Sometime in high school, so I was probably around sixteen. I thought I’d share, but please be kind when/if you comment. It took me a while to decide if I wanted to post this, and I almost decided not to.

 

He’s interested in you. He makes it a point to always call you when it’s convenient for him, and it’s usually convenient for him on Friday nights around 1:30 am. This is hard for you because you don’t wanna be that girl. Your friends have asked you why you still play along and why you have played along for months and you proceed to tell them they just don’t understand.

You’re never the girl to give a guy the one thing he doesn’t deserve until he’s gotten to know you with your clothes on. He’s supposed to know your birthday before he knows your bra size. He’s supposed to know your favorite color before he can figure it out because it’s reflected on all your lingerie. He’s supposed to know your heart before he knows you naked.

But let’s face reality here, ladies. No one does that anymore, right? I mean if you won’t give him what he wants, he will go find someone who will, right? Or he’ll just take what he thinks is his. And I guess when it comes down to it, that’s his choice. You can’t stop what doesn’t want to be stopped. It’s like trying to halt a hurricane. It’s like standing on the ocean shoreline and trying to stop a tsunami wave with just the palm of your hand. It’s like trying to change your mind when you’re already free falling off the cliff. But things happen for a reason.

Throughout all the misconceptions and rude statistics against it, I still think a woman should be treated better than that shit and worthy of something more that a physical satisfaction even as satisfying physical moments can be. But, that doesn’t mean a guy gets to sleep in your bed after the second date. He doesn’t get to come over only when he’s drunk. A women should be left wanting more.

 If you really stop and think about it, anyone can take their clothes off and have sex. It’s an easy act to follow through with. But to really stop and open up yourself to someone first; to share your likes and your dislikes; to tell your own story of why you are the way you are; to expose your insecurities and faults; to extend to someone things about you that you don’t even love yourself; to trust and to let someone into your heart when you haven’t let anyone else…

i think that’s truly being naked.

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10 thoughts on “On Being Naked

  1. So many women go through this. It’s a very common experience. I don’t think it’s anything to be ashamed of, but it is mystifying. Is it our culture? Why are guys getting away with treating their girlfriends this way? Why do we as girlfriends let this happen? Are women taught to devalue themselves? Is it pheromones? TV? Magazines? Youth? Addiction to love?

    And unfortunately, I don’t have any meaningful advice. I could say: don’t do it! But that’s meaningless in the face of how a girl feels in the moment.

    If I could go back in time and give some advice to myself, I would say: You’re prettier than you think you are. You’re worth more than you think you are. You have more options than you think you do. And if all else fails, pack your bags and hit the road: Europe, South American, wherever.

    Traveling will break the spell.

  2. Short attention spans. I attribute it to short attention spans. All things – be they a good recipe, physical manifestation, fulfilling relationship – come in the time they’re meant to come in. That timeline isn’t dictated by impatience or single-minded determination.

  3. More so than being naked, I believe that is a great description of love…whether that is love in the sense of best friends, or soul mates. It reminds me of what the Bible talks about on sex. Sex is the symbol of man and woman coming together as one to solidify a marriage and show true love, which is a representation of the relationship between God and the church. That is a true relationship of love. Love is not lust; liking only the sex and physical aspects. Its being completely naked in your thoughts and vulnerable. Vulnerability isn’t always a bad thing in that regard. Thank you for sharing this! I really enjoyed it!

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